Another One Bites The Dust

As per usual the new year came in like a damp squib this year. I think this festive season I’ve had a much more difficult time mentally than in previous years. To be perfectly honest, it’s been on a par with the entrance of 2005 …. bad year, but not quite as bad as the year before, but just a lot of stuff going on in my head this year. 2010 is now upon us and, as has become traditional, it’s time for the “how much has my life sucked” blog to arrive. I still have it better than most. At least I’m employed. Not happily employed but employed nonetheless and for that at least I should be grateful if I can’t be happy about it.
To be perfectly honest this year has been much less eventful than previous years. An uncertain employment situation hasn’t really help with the jauntage this year – my desire to arrange anything kinda lulling until I knew in June that I still had a job. Being told you’ll be employed verbally and getting it in writing in the current economic climate are 2 completely different things, so I didn’t exactly feel happy organising anything until I was settled and knew funding it wouldn’t be a problem. A couple of theatre trips, a comedy gig or 2 and 3 gigs is kinda pitiful considering my past performance – guess Paddy wasn’t touring this year. ;) I have however also spent a lot of time with the weight of the world on my shoulders. Feeling responsible for what other people do or putting other people first and feeling generally miserable.

I regained my passion for Jovi this year, not that I’m really convinced it ever went away. It just hit a new level this year with 2 trans-Atlantic trips on the cards. It doesn’t seem at the moment that I’ll be spending much time at home during April to July this year …. well maybe I will but the trips I’m planning are VERY close The 30th birthday New York trip has been put on hold for a little while for various reasons, but my 30th year will be celebrated in style with a Jovi gig in Dallas the day before. I think it’ll make me very happy (especially if a certain rock star serenades me on the night ;)) and at least it’s something different. My Jovi jauntage this year will be Dallas in April, 3 nights at Meadowlands in May and 3 more at the O2 in June – more if I manage to get the job I want and relocate to the capital …. or if the boss will allow me more days off. ;) I promise, until they start kicking off I will say no more. :) I have also invested in a ticket for a Kiss gig in May for fun and laughs. Apparently it’s a good show so it should be an experience if nothing else.

Speaking of work, I’m still on the lookout for my calling in this world. I think I’ve begrudgingly come to the reality that if I don’t manage to turn my life around this year, doing something I want to, rather than something I HAVE to, I never will. Certainly not the situation I find myself In now. My current work environment is consistently uncomfortable, stressful, and soul destroying. As I’ve said before, my boss exasperates me; be it the way he manages his department, his seeming lack of interpersonal skills or that he feels the need to ask everyone about everyone else’s job, apart from the person whose job it is if that makes sense. Also with my colleague and friend Suze leaving in about a week I think it will be even worse. When it all comes down to it, she keeps me sane in the place. The new girl will have a helluva a job to fill those boots. ;)

I did find a job that I thought I could really get my teeth into but I’ve not heard anything about it and it’s now seemingly unavailable. Whether that’s because they’ve just not told me they want me for interview, or if it wasn’t meant to be we’ll discover after Christmas. It may just have been taken down for the break.

I also need to attempt that whole “health” thing again. I kinda gave up on it when my numbers weren’t dropping even though my diet isn’t REALLY all that bad and I was doing my session every day. Of course, I STILL have no idea why it came to such an abrupt halt when my calorie intake was seemingly below the recommended intake and my activity level obviously increased.

I’m trying to embrace the whole “live your life” philosophy. I think I need to start playing the lottery or get a better job to fund my exploits! Lol!! So what’s brought about all this crap? It’s been a bad year in the world this year, and I don’t mean mine. It’s been difficult to see so many of my childhood idols leave this mortal coil and not one of them SHOULD have died …. all way too young to have left this plane of existence – the most recent being Brittany Murphy (only 2 years my senior) and the drummer from Avenged Sevenfold (never listened to them but the fact he was only 28 kinda freaked me out more). It kind of brought my own mortality even more to the fore. I’ve had this feeling for 6 years after losing my Dad, but I think someone high profile and my age kinda brings it back even more. What do they say? But for the grace of God that could be me – and I’m so not the religious type.

These people are all individuals who knew what they wanted, did it and I’m pretty sure enjoyed it and therefore lived life for them. Yeah, they had their obligations as we all do, but they had a life doing for them too. That’s something I need to do. I spend way too much of my time, seemingly even more so this year, putting my life on hold and putting everyone else first, or feeling responsible for other people and their actions but whereas the former may be an admirable trait, I need to learn to be selfish on occasion. ;)

OK, so this has turned into less of a retrospective and more of a “what’s to come”. Either way it’s suitable for this type of blog this time of year. I could go into how I’ve spent way too much money on CD’s and Guitar Hero this year, or how I bought my first ever concert tee from an actual concert rather than eBay, or that I have now entered the 21st century at last buy purchasing a Wii, DS and a DVR this year …. but everyone knows how much I enjoy a good ol’ shopping spree. ;)

I will , however, add one more thing. For another year I have had the best friends ever. You've been amazing yet again. I know you always are and you know I always appreciate it but I'm not sure I actually SAY it enough. Once again you've let me bitch and moan at you, regardless of what is happening with you, and have never asked for anything in return and for that I thank you. You keep me sane and you have no idea just how much I love you guys! xx


Here’s hoping that 2010 turns out to be a better experience for us all whether we realise it or not. Happy new year everyone. :)

H.
xx

Second Base

A little while ago I explained how I’d bought the EA Sports Active game for the Wii. Unfortunately, despite my best efforts, after nearly killing myself that first day I kinda shied away from it simply because it took a week for me to recover because I’m in that bad shape. Well I decided to attempt it again. Not the EA Sports thing, but the fitness thing.

My new attempt at sorting out my health came as a result of something that happened that scared me a little. It’s most disconcerting to be doing nothing more than sitting on a couch watching TV and to suddenly, for no apparent reason, getting palpitations and dizziness. Of course, it’s obvious that this is more likely my blood pressure taking a sudden nose dive rather than anything else but it did freak me out some.

I think at that moment it was proved that my blood pressure has been way too high. Whether that’s because of work (knowing what my working environment is like) or whatever, I’m not sure but it was certainly something I needed to address and was not going to be helped at all by my physical fitness.

So that made that decision for me. I ordered Wii Fit and the board and I’ve actually been better at keeping that up than I was at the EA Sports …. and it actually seems to be working …. at least as far as my daily stress level is concerned anyway. It certainly seems to have dropped since I started doing it. Granted I’ve only been at it a few days and the actual physical changes won’t be noticeable for a while but I’m definitely sleeping better and finding it easier to get up in the morning because I’m working my stress out. I think that’s part of where the EA Sports fell down. Firstly it was more high impact and secondly, I was stressing that I couldn’t, and wouldn’t be, able to keep up with it.

Time will tell whether it will be short-lived though, or whether I continue to work at it. I have to admit, even though it’s quite an easy workout, it’s a fun 30 minutes. It doesn’t really feel like a work out. I’m actually glad I bought it …. and afterwards I treat myself to some “You Give Love A Bad Name” on GH5 – I’m a fricking Rock God …. albeit on the easy level …. ;)

Not On The First Date

I came to the conclusion in recent times that it would probably be a good idea to try and get fit and lose some weight. Reason being that since I started my job I seem to have put on a little extra weight. So I wasn’t Kate Moss to start with, but I’ve been shocked recently when clothes that I used to fit in are feeling a little snug. It’s probably more than a little to do with the freebies we get at work that, let’s be honest, aren’t that good for a girl or her waistline.

I bought a Wii a couple of months ago on the pretense that I could buy the Wii Fit and work on trimming the waistline and get to a point where a defibrillator isn’t required when I reach the top of a flight of stairs. Up until now, the Wii has done a little Wii Sports, but has done more Guitar Hero – hey 5 coloured buttons and a switch are probably the only way that I’ll ever be able to play guitar with even a modicum of success despite the purchase of a guitar and amp my Mum made for me at Christmas. I’m a wimp – guitar strings make my fingers hurt. I’ll try it another day …. probably.

But I digress, back to the story. I’d been looking at the various Wii fitness aids/games (Wii Fit, My Fitness Trainer, etc), looked at the pros and cons, and reviews and eventually plumped for the EA Sports Active ‘game’. It arrived on Wednesday and I’ve been gearing myself to give it a whirl since. Well today I did the deed, and learnt a very valuable lesson. If you are one of the most unfit people on the planet do not, for the love of God, jump straight into the 30 day challenge – low impact or not.

I swear, I nearly died. I managed a 15 minute programme on the lowest impact level and didn’t do badly. But the absolute killer was the running (squatting coming a close second, swiftly followed by lunges -- basically anything requiring the use of leg muscles). Yes, there is a walking/running exercise which said 30-day Challenge uses as a warm up/warm down exercise. Not only did those bowling balls of mine very nearly give me a couple of nice black eyes (may be time to invest in a good sports bra, with extra scaffolding!!! ;)), but I could feel the excess inches also flapping around and hurting like hell and I hit that wall so hard and so fast that my legs were jelly by exercise number 3 …. That was about 4 minutes in. I did eventually say goodbye to 156 calories though ....

That’s not the worst part – although it comes close – the worst part was, a mere 5 minutes after my ‘low impact workout’ finished I discovered I had found muscles. My GOD I was getting stiff already. I guess that proves it’s done me some good but even as I write this 5 hours later and after a nice soak in a hot bath I can still feel the stiffness setting in. Every time I get up I’m walking like a navy …. or in an arthritic style. I’m so going to feel this in the morning.

Of course I recommend it right now. Does a bit of everything – lunges, squats, boxing …. inline skating!?!?!? – but time will tell whether it gets boxed away after a few weeks or it kills me. But nevertheless, the moral of the story is this. Don’t EVER think that you can just jump straight in at the deep end even if it is just a video game. Work up to it. I think I may have to try something different tomorrow …. if I can walk …..